Different? ...or special?

This poem has been written as a girl who is deaf, dumb and blind. She has been left by her parents into a Foster Care home. So, here goes the insight to a hazy mind…

I don’t have the power to see, hear or speak

By everyone around me, I’m regarded as weak,

But the strength that lies inside me is more than any mortal being,

I am dreaming, hoping and believing even though I’m not seeing.

Abandoned by my parents; no one I call my own,

There is no one to groan to, no one to moan.

Everyone says I’m a perfect little girl, with chubby cheeks and pink lips,

But from my eyes thick salty tears drip.

They called me different, but am I at fault?

Thinking about it, sometimes my whole life would come to a halt.

Love I had never known;

I was far from being a whole, in pieces I was torn.

There were so many questions, but there were answers to none

Looking for them was of no fun.

So many untold stories, so many undone things, so many unsolved mysteries,

I didn’t know myself, my past was history.

Memories from my childhood were faded,

To even think about it I hate.

I cry every night to myself silently,

And fight battles in the silent chambers of my soul violently.

Now is the time when I just want to give in,

Life has sucked my happiness and there’s no way I can win.

I can’t fight anymore,

What I want from life, I’m not sure.

There are so many questions that haunt me,

Will I ever be taken care of? Will I ever be free?

Will I ever know happiness or misery is all over my fate?

Will I ever know joy or is it only hate?

Will there ever be a time when people will stop being so indifferent?

…Or will I always be regarded as different?