....and I give myself away.

One thousands thoughts come to my mind,

Answers I'm looking for I can't find.

Questions are in abundance, but replies to none.

Every time I try to defy life, I realize it has won.

I am confused, and still in a daze;

Very astounded with life’s ways.

Each time I try to be strong,

It rips me apart and proves me wrong.

I have started doubting my reason for living,

Now I’m so fed up of existing.

So, I take the blade and bring it near my wrist

My entire life plays like a black and white movie in front of my eyes,

All the truths come back and so do the lies.

The people who made me proud and the one’s who let me down,

The ones who spread smiles and the ones who spread frowns.

As I think about them, a tear trickles down my face,

I digest the fact that I’ve lost this race.

I gave it my best shot, but it wasn’t enough,

I tired to overcome all the hurdles, no matter how rough.

I climbed the hills, crossed the rivers, and did every possible thing to win,

But sadly it wasn’t as much it would take to get in.

Maybe someone deserved life more than I ever did,

Waiting to enter the rat race, maybe there was a special kid.

So, with absolutely nothing in my head, I stare at my wrist and force my hand to slit it in two ; Finally, I am at ease

After going through hell, I had granted myself eternal peace.