Change is the only thing that in constant in this ever changing world. Change is very hard to accept for some people, like me, while others are very comfortable even when they're forced to live outside their comfort zone. It's not like that with me. I hate change. Once I get used to my surroundings, I want them to stay the same forever, but then forever is a very strong word. Everything in this world changes-people,feelings,circumstances, ambitions, dreams, hopes, aspirations,tastes- you name it,nothing but change lasts forever. Pushing my boundaries and doing something that my comfort zone doesn't allow me to has always been a difficult task for me. I like to live in my own happy world, with my own happy people. I don't like unfamiliar faces, unfamiliar voices, unfamiliar, uncanny eyes, or unfamiliar places. I know I should change, for the better, but its like I'm so comfortable in my own skin. I like myself. I'm proud of what I am, but I really need to learn how to cope.
I've always hated endings,too. The ending of a movie,a book, a relationship, a memory, a trip. Reading the last chapter of a book, the last few minutes of a movie, the rush of emotions I feel when I know a particular friendship is coming to an end, the guilt I feel over a certain things, the really bad feeling that doesn't even allow me to enjoy the last day of a trip...It haunts me. Everything feels weird. The sad kind weird. I hate it,so much. It drains me out, emotionally. It's sad.
But nonetheless, change and endings are inevitable.
And I will have to cope with change and learn to say goodbye, someday.
I've always hated endings,too. The ending of a movie,a book, a relationship, a memory, a trip. Reading the last chapter of a book, the last few minutes of a movie, the rush of emotions I feel when I know a particular friendship is coming to an end, the guilt I feel over a certain things, the really bad feeling that doesn't even allow me to enjoy the last day of a trip...It haunts me. Everything feels weird. The sad kind weird. I hate it,so much. It drains me out, emotionally. It's sad.
But nonetheless, change and endings are inevitable.
And I will have to cope with change and learn to say goodbye, someday.
To be sensitive means to be rooted to people and things...and it certainly is a beautiful trait to possess...also perhaps a trait that is on the decline.
ReplyDeleteChange is a phenomenon that happens at a purely subconscious level. A consciously brought about change in one's behaviour does not have as much impact as a subconscious level of change. This does set in gradually as experiences percolate in and mould us internally- most of the time, without us even being aware of it.
I liken to an oyster. The pearl within each one of us is our soft vulnerable emotional core. And as life moulds us, we weave layers of thoughts around this soft core. These layers are our strength and they protect our vulnerable core.
OH, my my.
ReplyDeleteYou, Vidya, have a way with words. It's beautiful how you play with them so comfortably.
Thanks for the feedback. :)